But tonight i felt something that i haven't felt in a long time- long meaning maybe a year or so. I was totally overcome by God: to the point i was just shaking uncontrollably. It was just weird but good to feel. I mean, it happens every once and a while- and it used to happen a lot when i started really focusing when i worshiped, but at some point it was like God just said 'enough of that,' and i really didn't know why. I still don't know why actually! Maybe because he wanted my close period with him to be when i was intellectually, not emotionally, dumbfounded by him? hmm... that could be it... (if you haven't noticed, i tend to be pondering while i'm typing :P). But it was good to feel- I can't even begin telling you how many times i have prayed to God to let me feel him again. JUST ONCE! That was one of my struggles all through Italy- God never truly took over my senses over there. I cried about it, i prayed about it, i read about it, but it just never came. Instead tho- i filled gaps in my knowledge of God that you wouldn't believe. New revelations came to me every single day.
So i guess that must have been it then. Maybe God pulled away the feeling part for a while so that i could focus all my attention on becoming close to him through my mind and my knowledge of him. Interesting. I guess the next question would be will it happen again? is this just a one time thing or did I break though a barrier that God temporarily put up for me? Time will tell...
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"Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye has seen any God besides you, who acts on behalf of those who wait for him"
Isaiah 64:4
~like i said before, What makes our God so unique is that all he asks of us is to make him our Lord. He wants us to love him and put faith in Him and he will answer us when we do so. Other religions you have to work hard- cause that way, if nothing happens then you can just blame urself. With our God, there is not alot of room to blame ourselves. We have to risk it all by just having faith that he will answer you.
"Do not be angry beyond measure, Oh Lord, do not remember our sins forever. Oh, look upon us, we pray, for we are all your people"
Isaiah 64:9
~This is a crazy powerful scripture. It just highlights the problem with the old covenant in the nutshell: THIS IS WHY WE NEED JESUS!!! If you read Isaiah through, God is fairly strict with his people. He punishes them for their sins if they did it for a while- and it was a harsh punishment. There is frustration between God and his people. God cannot come close to his people as long as there is sin between him and them. That sin wasn't going to go away as long as the people continued to sin and not take the measures to cover it. When the Israelites sinned too much, God just got very frustrated. There is his people- the one that he has put aside as his own- and they are dishonoring him over and over and over and over and over.
Thanks to Jesus, that isn't us anymore. Jesus took away the sin we did in the past and the sin we are going to do in the future. God doesn't have to see us as too filthy to even touch anymore, he can be close to us now with no kind of separation. Thank you Jesus!!! O.O
"Behold,, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind"
Isaiah 65:17
~i wanna go over this now, but now is not the time...
"The wolf and the Lamb will feed together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox, but dust will be the serpent's food. They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain."
Isaiah 65:25
Peace be with you.
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